Monday, June 30, 2008
ok germany lost haha had to pay my dad $5 but nvr did get the chance as he went overseas... well i'm at home at 1pm... shd be in sch now but got stomach pains... i think stomach flu... zzz very prone to that... well had lunch with the guys talked abt stuff n yea joshua like to punch my stomach... at least it made me vomit n felt much better now... well kinda tired... haha had auto cad lesson kinda fun... there was this diploma + prog as well n the subject is econs!!! weeeee her favourite topic to fail n it became my diploma + prog... haha how nice... i wonder i shd take it up... she said its hard n stuff but i dont know?? maybe i will?? i mean i'm a human kinda guy cuz i got b3 for my lit... haha human ok... i have a heart lols haha
well the thing that affected me most was ah ben's blog... the words he wrote made me think... seriously i wont write wat he wrote but his blog is linked to me.... but i can only say i will wait for u.... thats why i really love u... i can nvr forget those times we had... i wished i had spent more meaningful time with u... well if i really love u i would wait for u... but we'll see if this love of mine will fade... until now it has not... i really miss you... every MI Student i see i hope it would be you... ur smile just brighten my day n stuff... i hope you will give me the chance to love you... cuz i really mean these 3 words I LOVE YOU
Labels: 8 Letter 3 Words 1 Meaning I Love You
Fight on Monday, June 30, 2008
woke up at like 11 today?? zzz slept at 6 wake up 11 how nice somemore on a sun... lolol well had to go to grand ma hse to makan lunch... my mum's side... the grand ma which gambles alot n the grandpa which drinks alot... well both are smokers n alcholic n play mahjong pretty well haha before that went to buy germany to win!!! come on 1:3 odds if i win i only win $10 cuz laopa dont let me bet so much zzzz make me bet the smallest $5 so if win i win $15 lor haiix better than nth... gg to watch the match ltr... then after tt go my dad's side ah ma hse but she not at home so go home watched d-gray.man then suddenly slept.. woke up by leo's call saying he wan go lim zui... think he very shag over stuff but well everyone has his or her bad day... haha then called her to talk but she watching drama so dont disturb her... called her at night but she was reading her book gg peng san liao so yea haha...
actually i was supposed to ask her for an answer ytd but i guess not... she seems stress enuff bah... if the feeling where to come back to her just like tt i would'nt mind but it takes time.... well i rmb one of bro said this.... love her until u can find a better gal.... it may sound like a bastard bah but wat to do... u only wan the best in life right?? haha lols haha well it seems like her netball matches are just too simple for her... everyday winning... its like she go there to thrash ppl one lor haha well ivp is coming soon.... trg at sp still has'nt increased its intensity... haha i like tough training i dont know why... so i'm still following tham's trg... i really miss her... i just wan her back... she had a big impact on my life... i really cant forget her...
Labels: You Had The Most Impact On My Life
Fight on Monday, June 30, 2008
Saturday, June 28, 2008
ok well today i slept at 4am woke up at like 1pm?? knn father pull my down my bed hit the floor hard zzzzzzzzzzzz well woke up went to westmall to get my clothes for presentation $100 sia sian 2 shirt 1 pants... damn formal wanted to take a pic but i nvr make my hair so nvm haha after tt went to kfc ate with my family then just ate 2 chicken lor haha
went to the arcade after tt with my mum i blanja her play so yea thats why can go... westmall e zone changed to time zone n i played bball with her weeee we both score 350 haha she was like using netball style to play n stuff yea i was like machine gun just take n throw in haha well we had fun... after tt came home slacked talked to sh... she have a match against ite central.... mum said they play fast pace n stuff i dono if they can keep up haha well ite all play games very fast except their track haha well cant blame... told my dad i'm getting a new set of running stuff once i hit 11'5s Electronic time for my 100m haha he said i hit 1st then see how haha came home saw sp track blog... seems that they are training NUS high ppl weeeee haha i know them from last year cuz we went to NUS to train everytime since we did'nt have a track oh well it seems that nxt week i cant train with tham cuz he has national schools... seems like self trg for myself haha
well today is 28th june... the 1st time i spent my 28th alone in 15 months... weeee ok bah i hope she is still considering abt giving me that chance... i hope that we can still be good kor n mei if it doesnt work out... if u had been talking to me like i was another guy i wouldnt mind but becuz it gives me the feel that i'm ur enemy that i needa ask u.... i have totally stopped smoking already... i dono wat to do these few days but i still feel so lost without you... wats actually stopping u from giving me that yes??? no one really knows wat ur thinking
Labels: Stopped Smoking Weeeeeeeeee
Fight on Saturday, June 28, 2008
Friday, June 27, 2008
lets see ah... today oc sux man we suan the person presenting until so bad end up the mark like shit i wonder we present sure die lor after tt trg at sp.... came home very tired... talked to siewhong awhile abt stuff but dono wat to do...
well i know ur gg to read this sooner or later but yea i cant forget u... i tried within 1 month but i just cant i let u go with my feelings still intact it was like a fcuker of me lah i dont know wat to say but my mind is full of thoughts.... i really wan that chance thats all.... sry for short post but my head is full of thoughts now
Labels: I'm Not Good With Words But I Am Good At Making You Happy
Fight on Friday, June 27, 2008
Thursday, June 26, 2008
lets see... ok woke up at 4am today lah cant blame cuz i slept at 3pm to 7pm then wake up dinner 7.30pm to 4am haha watch germany match then watch some other movies.... well i went for bkfast as usual.... came home called her but end up she still sleeping i know she will kill me lah cuz she having sleep marathon then i go disturb her... really sorry ah ger... well went to sch at 12 was early for i2e lesson... kinda bored but i'm sure after today all my teachers will know i'm the best sleeper in class LOLS... mechanics i slp... auto cad i sometimes slp... i2e and ideas oso slp sure kena gan one lor sian... went for workshop ended early at 4?? ate dinner then met mx at jec to claim back $$... end up she like pay 2x wat she owe me lor haha pro right.... ok after tt she say hungry so we go batok buy mac she blanja me lols then went her hse downstairs makan i finished up my ciggy's... last time i would ever be smoking... very stressed out recently not abt r/s but abt sch life... talking to her makes me feel at ease but sometimes when she's not around i smoke zzzzz last box today is the serious last... i wont smoke ever again...
ok today right i'm so fucking stressed up whenever i see MI people... i get reminded of her thats the worse... i just cant forget her... whenever i see MI uniform = siewhong zzzzzzzzzzzz knn sia can die... haiix well i hope she would really consider my proposal to her haiix damn shag now tmr got electronics test... needa study number counting only cuz i suck at it... logic gates i can handle still well gtg study now... damn stress ah!!!!
Labels: Wat Is Wrong With Me?? MI Uniform Gals = Siewhong??
Fight on Thursday, June 26, 2008
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
lets see slept at 4.30am cuz studying mechanics which i ended up flunking... cfm one... 1st qns sure get full mark nxt 3 sure fail... anyhow write cuz i was kinda distracted abt stuffs lately... well ytd night had a talk with a special gal n i really changed my mind... i wanted to forget her but after talking ytd i felt i needed that 1 more chance u know... hope i will get it bah... cuz i'm very sure i can get things out of her ^^ haha well lets just see i now today she econs sure fail... haha she seems so unprepared but well i hope she do well for the promo exam... i really miss her alot.... well lets see i woke up at 6 went to sch for mechanics exam which i flunked 30% of my overall just like tt... core module n i flunk how nice... after that went trg at tanglin do weight n build up my neh neh so i can wear nicer clothes nxt time... after tt went home.. on e way home the whole tanglin SL army behind me at the aye bridge sia all shout my name i so pai seh sumore haha well SL taught me alot of life values n skills which i will nvr forget... ok the worse is that i slept through out 173 lolol nearly missed my stop just now... damn tired... gg to dry my hair n slp liao.... chiong sleeping marathon since mei mei oso chionging her beauty slp haha post again sometime ltr... if ur reading this... 1 chance is all i need 1 week is all i need n just 1 moment would be enuff
Labels: 1 Chance 1 Week 1 Moment
Fight on Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
ok lets see woke up at 6 just to go bkfast with parents... ended up eating fishball mee wana go trg one but horhx i reach home 1st thing leg damn nua lie on bed ended up slping... woke up at 9 then leg pain got even worse forced myself to slp until 12.30 zzzzz woke up late for sch... ended up rushing to sch in cab... studied for electronics test but end up got no test cuz they say test during tutorial... but tmr cfm got mechanics test one... cuz tutorial n lecture is on the same day so die die sure got test tmr... ended sch at 3pm went to holland to find uncle haron n asked him abt track n field... well he was surprised to see me n stuff but i found out 2 major things.... i've been wasting 3 months of my life n being a national athlete aint gg to do me good... so yea maybe i shd just run for sch n if i ever get any bonus take it as a blessing lor... suddenly had the urge to smoke anti-socially n did so on my way home... 1 stick thats all i had today... thats all well i feel kinda bad n stuff but fuck it lah damn shag these few days... haiix ppl shooting me at different angles abt stuff makes me really think n stuff.... this kind of thinking worst than mahjong lor... well was talking on msn to sj n py just now... told sj i brb n he suddenly log off LOLS well gtg study for mechanics.. .tmr 20% of overall test sian!!! sure fail one lor
to shi jie: well u know feelings are just there... rmb that she was the one that left me u know how u expect my feeling to go??? i wish i could screw her but nvm bah i dono wat to do now... she may be a gem to me in the past but she was still that gem... i really wish to know wats gg on in her mind but i cant... she really wana keep things from me u know n how u expect me to go with so many thing unasked.... haiix maybe i was very hiong on the "thing" ytd lah but i'm damn stress abt this... my life now very stagnant... i wish to carry on but u know i just cant fucking do anything now... its like imagine if py suddenly leave u just like tt lor...
Labels: FUCK IT LAH WAT AM I SUPPOSE TO DO NOW
Fight on Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Monday, June 23, 2008
weeee did not slp today even though i nvr slept ytd... got 96.4% for autocad test... stupid hong jie this good bro get 100 then end up i was behind him T_T but mr roy is a serious joker... the only lecturer i know that really jokes around haha... then we ate at fc3 nasi lemak sux... but the longan jelly was ok... cuz cheaper n same standard as kofu then we had the stupid IDEAS lesson in the workshop kinda lame... wished i had pon it.... well i left 1hr after class saying i not feeling well hehe but actually i went to clementi to go training haha slept on 156 on the way there... feeling damn shiok... woke up becuz a gal sat beside me zzzzz not chio but not ugly i just rate her 5/10 lah horhx haha
well today's highlight was SP Coach Pandian met Mr Tham.... zai zai right we were training at ccab stadium... then i saw cresent ppl trg so i tot they so hard working then coach pandian saw me n asked me why i nvr train with sp... told him i did'nt like coach paul method of trg then told him that i would train under mr tham n ran as a individual 100m sprinter for sp if i ever made it... i would miss the 4x100m badly becuz i'm not trg with the team n i have baton fear... coach pandian asked me to do hurdles but i oso got hurdle fear haha well he said the fastest will represent n a time trial would be called for... its like it really brightened up my day lah having to hear a person from SP side still giving me support... well i wished to find uncle haron one day but i dont have the time... needa talk to him abt track stuff as well haha
ok after that went to toh yi market for dinner.... ate char kway teow n oyseter omelette... after that slacked under sj's block n talked abt stuff.... really emo lah today... thinking abt stuff n wether it really made sense to me or not... well she's the problem to all this HOWEVER she is also the solution to my problem... i dono bah see how it progress... gtg slp soon tmr needa train at tanglin in the morning... ivp here i come!!!
Labels: I'm Sorry I Broke A Promise So Dear To Me And You
Fight on Monday, June 23, 2008
post edited... R21 Content was involved xD but my mind is clear now... haven slept was thinking of stuff thx eliza
Labels: Love Is Cruel
Fight on Monday, June 23, 2008
Sunday, June 22, 2008
woke up damn late today abt like 5.30pm?? well actually woke up at 11am then 2pm then 3pm then 4pm cuz my family very noisy haha 1st time they so noisy... actually i slept at 9am could'nt slp lah thats why keep thinking of somebody... haiix wanted to find some bros to talk but all slping haha... but end up i hugged my jacket to slp... the smell of the jacket remnds me of her... haiix i really miss her!!! well life now is still damn lonley... but the good qns is wether i wana continue jioing her or shd i wait?? i dono?? still trying to think of that qns but i dono the answer... shi jie said tat she would msg me n stuff unless she's not in a good mood... but he said that if u wana jio her back still got chance but very hard... haiix life sux man... cant smoke cant drink... cant smoke becuz i promise her i wont... cant drink becuz of my running n dont wana pull down my performance... well tmr is the start of my actual training liao... can die lor... haha...
i actually asked her out to eat with me on sat the 28th june but well i know i was stupid enuff to ask n surly get rejected... haiix i really wan her back but i dono wat to do... 1 month already n i'm gg to die soon... i just cant stop thinking of her... at least she's better than sa lah break up at least we got talk still... haiix someone tell me wat to do... anybody?? i wana get her back but i know she doesnt wana get back with me... i dono wat to do..
Labels: I'm So Lost Without Her
Fight on Sunday, June 22, 2008
ok just finished 4 rounds of mahjong 2 with leo ben justin then another 2 with my mum dad n aunt... play with leo ben justin lost alot... damn blur lah me trying to make big hands but cannot haha then end up played with my mum dad aunt all the big hands come out but i small fry lah cuz i play 10c then they play $1... total ban xi come out 6 times u know damn high lah then a few times must play small... 1st round won alot cuz i ban xi like drink water like tt then 2nd round change seat.... no luck lor COULD HAVE ban si 3 times but end up all kena won by my mum or dad... won a total of $10 then my mum n dad won abt $60+... if i had played by $1 tgt i would have won $10 lols but nvm lah small thing only once in awhile family this kind shd play... lucky my ah por nvr come if not i sure lose until i week allowance bo liao haha
well siewhong was at chalet today... did'nt msg her much ... i just wana be a good bro to her thats all... i may wana get her back but that would be like the end of the year if i wanted to... now not a good time for me oso... projects killing me ... tmr sch reopen can die...
now let me see gg to just stay awake play some dota until 7am folo bro go gombak stadium to watch him jump n watch tanglin ppl run... i really wish to train with mr tham... but the thing is if i were to do this i would risk my place in sp relay team n representing the sch... the rate i'm gg now i think i can win sp short d runners by july?? maybe aug i can... i dono?? see how this progress into bah... lols sian i today did'nt drink beer!!! surprisingly actually its becuz no beer left haha lolol... life without her is totally quiet... she brings joy into my life but well now it seems rather quiet... i will either stay single or get her back... dono the choice yet but we'll see ^^
Labels: Time Will Tell Everything I Need To Know
Fight on Sunday, June 22, 2008
Saturday, June 21, 2008
last post before i slp... i'm gg crazy 1 day post 3 times siao one haha lols well shi jie said my eyes are clearer at night... not as in see zha bor or wat but more of wat u think lor... haiix i really miss siewhong but i dono if i shd get back with her... my track jacket got her smell she just returned me i smell it ah damn shiok lor but haiix zzzzz i really miss her!!! haiix i cant believe i'm so attached to her still... its time i let go but i cant... but the big problem for me now is if i shd still be with her lor u know wat i mean?? dono then too bad lols... well gd nite guys cya
Fight on Saturday, June 21, 2008
Friday, June 20, 2008
here to post again nth to do... well finally got a song... i know very lao tu lah but hear the lyrics not bad... actually i that time drunk at karoke hear my mum n dad sing not bad haha then choose this song lah haha lols
ok bad news my freaking injury is back n its at a place where most guys wont wan it to be... not exactly there but near the area... time to watch my daily lifestyle or it could get worse... but i needa go acupunture n it really hurt the last time i went there T_T lols haha
well cant msg siewhong for now she needa study her mid year 2 days away i wish her all the best... she says she gg to flunk it but nvm better to start now then end of year the exams more jia lat haha she said i would lash out at her after he mid year but i was like for wat?? i lash out she come back i dont mind lah but i lash out she sad i sad got use?? haha lols see i've grown up liao lei haha lols
well i think i'll have a early night tmr morning go for a 3km jog liao T_T time to get back fitness liao... post more tmr bah
Labels: GL HF GG
Fight on Friday, June 20, 2008
today woke up at like 6?? stupid rain lah thunder n lightning cannot slp lolol then wake up at 6 nua in bed awhile then go trg.... today trg only do complex weights did 2sets n died like siao head damn pain lah... well mr tham talked to me abt siewhong n stuff yea she returned my 2 jackets n hp to me... well mr tham was right i did destroy my body during that time... i drank alot smoked alot n stuff but i woke up before SL camp... i did'nt know how he knew it but i think that it was siewhong's frends that cfm tell him lah but at least i'm grateful they did... really woke up before he screwed me just now.... after that talked to siewhong awhile... she was studying... hardworking gal but now is wether i shd get her back or not cuz if i do i dont wana affect her studies... but if i dont i may regret it?? i deeply like her... tham said that i had my fun she had her fun time to move on no matter wat the fucking reason is... he said is i scared no gal wan me lolol but u know feelings dont fade easy... he even say if i threaten die n stuff she get back with me got use?? of course no use lah its like no feeling there mah... if wan get her back at least do it all over again but this time with more sincerity?? i dono?? still cant decide yet... reason i changed my blog add cuz this blog was to post abt abt siewhong... a place where i can let it out... if she finds out then i dono wat to say liao... i know she cares for me but yea frends shd be frends.. time will tell everything
as for trg that side... mr tham was willingly to train me but he is still puzzled by why cant the fastest represent the sch?? i mean that i can beat james boon kiat stanley litterally flat if i could just get back my minimal form like last year... they are just consistenly running 11.8-12 flat n i was previously running 11.7 no more than that... they still wan me to train with the coach cuz they think that i can excel with him but how to?? his trg doesn't suit me at all... basically i'm not used to slack trg... i miss mr tham... i miss his trg... even though its very tough but yea kinda fun haha... i siao one ok haha... well i'm gg to train with wei lun, jacky n tracy for IVP in october maybe got other seniors i dono?? haiix i really wana prove my dad wrong... he says that whenever he's watching me run i cant perform... i know it like makes him sad n stuff but i shall really needa concentrate on my running n studies like how sh is with her studies n netball haha..
got back both my track jackets n got sh smell... zzz i hate to admit it but i really miss the smell actually i nearly slept when i smelled my jacket... so nice smell but maybe nxt time go chance haha lolol went out to taka just now to celebrate my ahma bday n stuff ate at crystal jade not kinda nice cuz i dont like dim sum food not very nice... haha gg to rest now i'm sick actually haha post more next time... the below post if for Mr Tham if he were to every find this blog
well u were like my best frend that i every had in tanglin... the 1st impression i had of u was very scary.. u were like the kind that would scold at every wrong mistake... u caught me into track during my sec 1 napfa test when i ran 9.7 for my shuttle run u asked which cca i was in n when i said track n field i know i was doomed... i was the fastest sprinter that had not been trained at all u said ( except chin hwee cuz we both ran the same timing during our 1st trial) benedict n jamus all ran slower than me at the start n they progressed very fast u said i could be like them but i was'nt serious my 1st competition in sec 2 i only improved a mere bit from 13.1 to 12.8... i was wondering if i was doing everything right... sec 2 i peaked to 12.5 u did'nt give up on me when i wanted to give up during year end... u gave me another chance in sec 3... i did'nt turn up for trg regularly during jan n feb but becuz i had pre season trg in nov dec i did'nt deproved... u screwed me almost everyday becuz i did'nt wana turn up... end up in sec 3 i started to train n give it one last chance i ran 12.2 offically... i was so hyped up with trg... but i only had 3 months of proper trg that year... i did'nt wana give up n kept trg after nationals... in sec 4 i was sick very badly during the 1st 2 months but still u would'nt give up on me... i came for trg n soon i broke a sch record that was standing for 25 years... i wanted to hug u that time but cuz i was infont of the whole sch i would'nt pai seh the both of us haha well soon after that national finals came pouring in like water n stuff... i would like to thank you for being there for me in the 4 years in tanglin... i would skip trg everytime its ur bday cuz it was also my bday april 18th!! haha but all the troubles i've been through u were there to help me... n thx for being a good coach n a person whom i can confide in... if i were to ever really make it to national standard i would really want to thank you for teaching me track & field n not giving up on me when i had the potential thank you for brining me where i am now....
well yea he's the best coach one can ever ask for... even in sp when i have a coach that trained our national record holder i would rather wan mr tham than him...
haha well now that he asked me to quit drinking... this is gg to be worst than quitting smoking haha well i have the potential to be that fast... why limit it by drinking n smoking?? alot of my frends were like so shocked that i smoke... they were like " ur a fucking athlete that runs so fast why u wana smoke n kill urself??" now i know haha now i know.... end year i have smth to accomplish for my dad... nxt year for my self n the following year for all that have not given up hope on me... wish u were here so i could talk to u...
Labels: Quiting Drinking Is Harder Than Quiting Smoking
Fight on Friday, June 20, 2008
Thursday, June 19, 2008
well done with my mahjong session today very tired... but yea won abt $12?? end up i blanja them makan abt $9 so nvr win that much haha... u see when one win $$ u must not keep ur wealth n share with others.... haha i'm a good guy lolol jkjk....
i missed trg today lah knn sian... woke up at like 12pm sumroe... i tmr better make sure i go back trg if not i can go fly kite liao lah... zzzzz saw sp 4x100m video on their blog kinda fast but i dono i think last year tanglin track team was even faster.... haiix i dropped the baton that day when we were already running a timing of overall 1st... cuz we actually owned siglap sec until si bei jia lat then end up siglap sec get 1st overall since we drop the baton haiix.... shall not talk abt it.... i got baton fear liao
went to jec during noon with sj n mx to get sj recovery disk played a few games of id4 n i suck at it... thinking of quitting soon may sell my card... 1st is becuz my card is named Y^S^H it brings back alot of memories sumore T_T haha 2nd is becuz of i sux liao... after that we played the bball shooting i won shi jie 130-85 zzzzz noob score dont laugh i very pai seh one haha last time can shoot 400+ now 200 oso cannot haha ate laksa after that n i was damn angry lah whole bowl so big only 3 pieces of hum zzzzzzz sumore $3 haiix.... gg to dota n slp... hope that one day i can just get a good night msg from her thats all.... i really miss her T_T
Labels: Missing SomeOne Is Less Painful Than Forgetting Someone
Fight on Thursday, June 19, 2008
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
well woke up today like 6+?? kina awsome right?? slp damn long lah but bo pian very long nvr sleep... didnt slp for 2days... then lucky trg cancelled at 7am when i abt to leave hse... so slept through lah haha but tmr got trg haha dono where oso tham haven reply me... well mahjong lost drinking game oso lost but kinda fun... then woke up kenrick msg me " eh the pasir ris gal blowjob how much n stuff" then i was like zzzzz why ask me " i oso nvr do before" i think he curious to do sia lolol but well i dont do this kind of stuff.... i'm innocent boi boi haha lolol well heck it bah
today i did'nt smoke as well!!! but i dono if i shd tell my parents if i got smoke socially n not as a lifestyle... i think they will kill me.... lolol but i shd ask tham 1st... i got a feeling he knows that i'm smoking.... my whole track team knows... but it has a bad impression on me to others... Mei Ling my last year captain said... imagine if u got smoke n got ang kong as a proffesional athlete it will like ruin ur image u know.... sad now i know the feeling oso haha well i promised siewhong that i wont smoke... i promised her not to smoke not that i can get smth back from her ( u guys know wat i mean) but more of becuz she's my good mei was once a good gf to me so yea trying to stop it cuz of her... she has a big influence in my life lah she dono why... i hope she has not thrown my stuff away cuz i haven thrown hers away... the ring i still wear with me but now on my right hand becuz left is married right is wear for fun... but it holds alot of memories to me lah... now only a few bros know wat i'm doing with my life... haha hope my plan works
Labels: Drinking Is My Lifestyle... Smoking Is Something I Wish To Stop
Fight on Wednesday, June 18, 2008
yea baby i'm alive n kicking!!! lolol yea ytd damn drunk cant upload pics.... well here are the pics i promised u guys...
Ben's Dead
So Is Shi Jie
So is Leonel
But I Am Not
Just Joking xD
well when i heard that from mei xuan saying that when i was drunk i keep saying i miss siewhong n i love her n stuff but zzzzzzzzzz i dono why i'm so deeply in love with siewhong sumore... haha relax at least i can talk to her happily now... thats wats called friends... haha actually shi jie wanted to get drunk so he can slp but end up i keep losing alot n keep drinking until i died lah.... i drank like 3-4 cups of vodka + beer then drink beer sumore zzzzzz ho seh liao ah... haha i did not smoke ytd cuz i promised her i would not smoke... i must stop smoking before my parents find out n skin me alive... well cya gtg give ben back his psp cuz he left it at my hse ytd
Fight on Wednesday, June 18, 2008
fucking unconsious now... drank like vodka + carlsberg in a single cup... only left me n my fav sis mei xuan alive... shi jie leonel ben are all dead... haven drink they die liao... only drink beer they die.... me mei xuan drink vodka + beer still ok can tahan... only we cannot walk str8 n that wei jie oso folo us.... well will post pic nxt time... all in my hp lazy to upload only... drank 3 cups of vodka + beer... becuz the stupid mei xuan got sch bo pian i must drink... shi jie n ben oso... now they are dead only left me walking uncounsiously alive still... will post more pics more nxt time.... gtg peng liao bb i hope i nvr did anything wrong today i wana vomit liao bb
Fight on Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
ok now at leo's hse blogging... today went shopping but end up nvr buy anything nth really caught my attention n if they did they are god damn ex lah.... haha well saw the rest of my bros buy until nobody buisness all so rich one... father print money for them haha... lolol anyway watched the hulk tgt with them kinda nice to watch lah... its like the bruce cannot hit 200 heart beat or smth like tt then end up when he gg to do that "thing" u know he end up cannot do lolol suay right the gal so horny liao wana do even ask alittle bit oso cannot.. haiix so sad become hulk cannot have sex one haha lolol
well this is the only post of the day where i will have total conscious of myself before i go drink n mahjong n dota n soccer haha lolol hope i dont send siewhong wrong stuff... haha yea well went to ah ben hse then now leo hse.... haha ltr my hse to settle it once n for all... wana post more but well shall stop here wait till ltr i playing mahjong then post lah haha
i really missed her but i think i would just leave it to fate.... well i have smth up my mind now that only one bro know.... haha so relax hope i dont get drunk ltr lolol
Labels: I Have Made Up My Mind And I Will This Through
Fight on Tuesday, June 17, 2008
back from trg... tired sial 1st time trg so damn tired... haha quite fun talked with tham abt my sp trg... still dono wat to do yet lor well just train bah
let me see i know i'm gg to die today... i haven slept.... now needa rush to go out meet the bros for lunch n shopping... yea time to buy new clothes... my sense of fashion sux so jio-ed them along.... haha i promised her not to smoke n yea try my ebst today.. i hope i dont send her msgs which will spoil her mood... haha as usual mahjong ltr then thon then tmr got trg die ah... maybe i shall slp at night... well i love this body of mine... not becuz its hot but more of becuz i slp 3hrs i feel energized liao haha zai right... well gtg liao they all spamming my hp zzzzzzzz post more when i get back
Labels: 1 Tanglin Training Can Never Beat 100 SP Trainings
Fight on Tuesday, June 17, 2008
3am liao lei i still doing up this stupid skin.... well finally done it... seems kinda nice... if it still sux then i really dono wat to say liao... many ppl complain n found this blog... i dono how oso... maybe becuz URL too easy to find... my name .blogspot.com n taa daa u got my blog zzzzzzzzzzzz.... lolol
well today slept from 3pm-6pm nvr went trg even though i was awake... not feeling well had serious stomach pains today... i'm not a gal but i think its gastric pain... nvr been eating well... ate very little for dinner but i ate alot for supper....
well i actually managed to talk to someone today like a real frend... dono if she wana make me feel good or she really is sincere abt it... i hope she's sincere abt it... maybe she's given me another chance but dont wish to say it... well if its really true i would be happy.... she say's it hard to get her feelings back but i know i can do it!!! well if i cant get it back then i seriously have to give up.... i mean i seriously dont understand we did not have any quarrels before except for the times we were abt to go our seperate ways... well she said i deserve i better gal but i just wan her... a simple gal is enuff... i dont wan a better one cuz ur the best one for me... u tell me not to pin too much hopes on u but well ur the best gal i can find.... i really wish i could get u back.... SJ ask me if i ask for patch i told him no.... well lets see if i were to patch with siewhong but the feelings not there got use?? i just need the chance to jio her from scratch litterally 0... its hard but i know i can do it...
had like a so called bad discussion with my SP Track vice president today... at 1st i was happy that i could train with mr tham but when he found out i was the sprinter nicholas n not the thrower nicholas the whole situation changed.... i cant train with mr tham cuz coach wan all year 1 to train with him... zzzzz but i feel his trg is abit like unsuited for me... well i talked to my captain just now n he offered me a suggestion... show the coach how u gg to train n stuff n do up a journal so he can keep track of me... but i dont really understand... he trains his fav guy n he recently ran 12.5 in 100m!!! even my juniors all can win him lor.... i trained with him n my performance is stunned there... i dont know why... my initial plan was to train with mr tham then go to uncle haron but now its screwed up... i hope i can find a way out...
well tmr gg out to town with the rest of the bros go watch incredible hulk.... talk abt movies i kena reminded of siewhong again ah!!!! i actually wanted to bring her go watch kong fu panda that joker movie but the day was actually the day we broke off T_T haiix... i shd have shut my mouth when i asked her for her true feelings that time i was at her hse but i had to ask... if i had shut my mouth i now would still be with her n i actually would have done alot of sweet stuff during the hols with her but nvr had got the chance.... ah stop thinking of the past n hope i get a silent chance from her soon.... btw i nvr did smoke already since SL camp with the rest of the guys... see i got the temptation lah whenever my father smoke infront of me but haiix must resist i promise her not to smoke oso!!! n cuz i'm back with mr tham to train i cant smoke oso if not he take the spike shoe step me until i die ah... haha well tmr i know the bros will smoke... i shall resist peer pressure n temptation n just mahjong n win more $$ haha lolol
Labels: I Would Be Happy If I Got That Silent Chance
Fight on Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Monday, June 16, 2008
ah well had a hang over ytd... drank too much i think i lashed out someonebody but i dont even realize wtf was i doing.... ok i shall seriously write out all my feelings today n if she were to ever come across this blog good for her.... well let me start my life story today....
In short 2803 1649 was the fav 8 no.s for the both of us... since that day we've been doing many things tgt u baked cookies for me... we watched fireworks in each others arms... u cried on me when ur mid year n prelim results were like shit... i would lend u my shoulder to cry on every time i sent u home... we would eat dinner tgt after our trainings.... share the 2 for $2 pokka green bottle... i was the 1st guy to celeberate ur bday with u n ur family... we had dinner with each other's family... yea happy times we had at each others places as well xD...
but half the early year we are still going damn strong until the day posting results came...u went into MI i went into SP 2 diff schools 2 diff lifes... i tried to keep it tgt but it seems u did'nt care... studies n netball were ur 1st priorities i did'nt mind but whenever i tried to ask u out... ur frends would be more impt.... becuz u had a project to do?? i did'nt mind but 1hr project n after that go party??? this went on for quite some time... i was patient... whenever i would force u to meet me... u were unhappy or rather felt weird becuz ur in sch uni i was in home clothes.... i did'nt have the chance to send u home after that day... despite this i still was patient with u... until the point u have eventually lost feelings for me.... many say it was becuz of ur kor kor but i chose to believe myself n say that i can get ur feelings back... but i was wrong.... i made a big mistake... u were no longer the yong siewhong i knew u wanted to study n stuff... i held u too tightly but i could'nt let go... ppl said u were a flirt i did'nt bother... u know ur kor kor for 2 months n i have known u for close to 20 over months n u are more closer to ur kor than to me?? haiix u are so god damn selfish
definition of the word TRUST = reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence. well i actually had alot of trust in you but i nvr seem to get it back... u stopped ur blog i asked why but u said u had no time... until one day i went to ur hse n found out u have a live journal?? i'm like so stunned at least if u wana make a live journal tell me i dont mind but keeping it from me is another thing.... u need space to write ur heart out i dont mind i wont even look at it up till now ( actually i just cant rmb the URL)... i trusted u so much... but i nvr got any back... at times i was worried for u when u said u n ur frend were gg out with a bunch of guys... i was jealous ok... but that day we were fated to meet each other... i did'nt arrange to meet u but we just did wearing the same colour shirt sumore... but that day was also the day u started losing trust in me... i held u too tightly it was my mistake...
studies are impt to the both of us i must admit... without studies who can live in this cruel world?? sometimes i trust u are studying hard but with results that are able to make u retain this year... i have 2nd tots... if u put so much into studying then why do u still party like there's no tmr?? at times i really can tell when u are serious abt studying but i know that ur attention span if very short n that when u tell me ur kor kor give u tuition for like 4-5hrs??? i kinda find it hard to believe...
friday 6th june the day we broke up face to face... u said we could be frends but u dont seem intrested all i get was cold replies from you... i'm glad u moved on with life but i dont think i can... i would drink n smoke all day i promised you not to smoke but yea here i am doing it... haiix lucky i have sj this bro to shag with me last time n in the future... nxt time can jio ben oso
well these few days i've been a real fucker to you.... especially ytd when i was drunk... i really lashed out at you... i made u hurt i was wrong... i'm like damn despo to have you back but i see no chance... even ur kor kor which u know for a few months is more closer to u than me?? wtf is the meaning of this?? i dont get it u know.... someone pls explain it to me... i really want another chance but i think you would rather give it to someone else... we cant even be frends now... ppl say this r/s failed becuz of u... becuz it was one sided love... i dono??? i think i also have fault in this failed r/s but who knows... i really wished for that 2nd chance but u refuse to give me?? u know u are selfish u know... i had to give u up so that i can make u happy... ever bothered abt me?? i just wish to talk to u like a good frend but you dont bother... u are really selfish u know... i feel like lashing at you face to face but i shall not... well that's my life story i guess dono if got other things i shd add in anot maybe nxt time
Labels: This Is My Life Story... Lets All Watch It Unfold
Fight on Monday, June 16, 2008
Sunday, June 15, 2008
ah well lets see... just woke up.... talked to someone for awhile... seems she's hiding the truth from me.... she cant kope with studies n yet she's pretending to me that she's studying damn hard lah.... weeee how smart of her but yea who cares.... with her attitude like tt she cant even make it past 1st year with flying colours.... i think she will retain... very bad right me haha but who cares she told me her CA1 test results last time n she really flunked them haha... well i wana lash out all my feelings at her but i shall wait until after her mid year... see i'm a good guy right haha lols
well today is my parents 20th year anniversary... i was like KNN SO LONG AH 20 years.... i cant even tahan my relationship for 20 months they can 20 years haha lolol dono where we gg to eat dinner oso but sure is good food to makan one hahah lolol will post more when i get back lah lols
Labels: I'm Just Waiting To Lash Out Everything At You
Fight on Sunday, June 15, 2008
well today saturday ah... let me see i have this unusual sleeping habit... where by i slp for half the day lets say 9am i slp until 3pm wake up then 9pm slp until 2-3am lolol zai zai right haha anyway catched the holland n france match they are like 4-1 sia total thrashing sumore.... then 9am go slp again haha lols zai right....
woke up at like 4pm then my bros wan come thon but parents dont let... 1stly ah ma bday 2ndly their 20 years anniv is like today then they dont wana be disturbed u know haha nvm bah tue we thon until we die... anyway daddy had learned to accept the fact i drink vodkaa becuz he refuse to let me drink n only wan me to drink beer... at ahma bday drank 2 glasses of beer only.... n my other guy cousin was like just staring at me drinking?? i dono why?? today ate $400 meal very nice got abalone shark fin longan nice noodle n duck... i love the fish!!! haha well enjoyed the dinner damn full.... bro got his own psp...
well i talked to 2 ppl today... my favourite maths teacher ms tan n my mei aka ex-gf haha well ms tan wanted to kill me cuz she know i smoke n drink beer she tot i taking it out on my body cuz i sad over the break up with siewhong haha well i dono??? maybe i was but i have to accpet life... i really hate her actually for forcing me into this spot... haiix wat to do gals are always pampered.... maybe she dumped me for another guy?? i dono?? true feelings would nvr be revealed haha well we talked abit today... she seems fine... but she's got trouble with her work... and i'm worried for sumore... wa lao eh 1 week we break up liao n this happens?? i dono sia i think i miss her alot.... but i dono?? her netball has improved but her studies has deproved... well i miss her alot n just wana be with her again but who knows?? fate will decide for me
Labels: Fate Will Decide If We Would Ever Be Together Again
Fight on Sunday, June 15, 2008
Friday, June 13, 2008
well today went to dental early morning at 9.30am but i slept at 7am so yea drag my feet go out... slept through out the whole journey... come home peng liao haha....
i've been wondering.... looking back at the past... 14 months r/s is hard to forget... i cant seriously forget it but how did u do it... unless ur not human?? i dono?? maybe u have another target thats why u dont feel a thing for me.... haiix... thinking back just wana make me cry... but u said this we can still be frends / kor/ mei but when i msg u now its like no reply at all?? haiix i really think u are a cold hearted person.... you wanted this break badly not me.... i did it n ur not even sorry or grateful at all to me.... i'm so like fucked up u know.... when i need someone to talk to u... u refuse to talk to me.... haiix..... so fucked up now.... i wish i dont have to think of the past but 14 months is long long way.....
Labels: I Cant Forget You In 14 Days Over a 14 Months Relationship
Fight on Friday, June 13, 2008
Thursday, June 12, 2008
finally back after 4 long days.... weee so damn fun lah 4 days right monday nvr sleep tue sleep 1hr ytd nvr slp... zai zai so damn high lah but haiix i still keep thinking abt stuff... i dono wat to say man.... i really miss siewhong.... now she my mei oso but i think she has another target or another person target her n she wana give them chance... haiix i dono wat to do sia... sp np got so many chio bu's but why her??!!! ah!!! i really love her alot sia i dono how come zzzzzz.....
well SL camp was damn fun lah very shag... 1st time felt the shagness in a camp after 2 long years.... i really enjoyed it nvr blew my temper on the juniors except one time during the night walk.... well i had to zao camp to come home to slp cuz got dumb sp OC project to rush by tmr lah zzzzzzzz can die lor slp 1 hr in 4 days... ok lah not say 1 hr at most 3hrs.... cuz usually ppl wake up me just to say " i gg toilet ah" i'm like wtf man zzzzz.... well i actually liked wat the passer-by said to me... becuz i really wan her back but she has no feelings slowly i can... but will i be able to do it?? i dono?? ppl say i shd move on.... but sometimes i'm stuck... well i'm sure my hya tees sure miss me to play dota with them haha but well they have thier own share of problems haiix this time of the year many couples break for no ryhme or reason.... i really love yong siewhong but i dono wat i shd do now...
Labels: 4 Days 1Hr Sleep And I Still Cant Forget You
Fight on Thursday, June 12, 2008
Monday, June 9, 2008
well today is monday i'm gg for SL camp to emo n shag out there i'm sure i will be able to chu qi on the juniors n really see who can tahan me weeeeeee i'm a bastard well... not feeling any better now... really missed her alot.... i really regretted wat i've done by wj tell me to cool it off awhile n if u wan jio her back again but i dono if i shd do that anot... well at least at camp can kup ciggy from someone haha...
wont be back till thur night cya guys!!! all my bros so sad dont have such a pro like me to dota with them haha jkjkjkjkjk anyway be back on thur cya
Labels: Love Is UnForseen
Fight on Monday, June 09, 2008
Sunday, June 8, 2008
Well today was a very shag day.... woke up in my living room... did'nt sleep on my bed... i saw my msg " chances are slim" to get back with siewhong... haiix i really dono wat to do... i just want my feeling to fade n jio her all over again but i dono if i should.... nvr even touched my ciggy or alchohol today.... i msged her in the evening and i really wished a miracle would happen.... i could eventually see her love fading for me when i think back but why did'nt i noticed anything?? haiix i'm such a fucker i knew her feelings has faded but i cant do anything... she refuse to let me meet her... her friends were way more impt than me.... i could'nt do anything.... i wanted to be there for her but i cant... was it my fault?? i dono?? someone pls slap me awake.... i can cfm that no frends close to siewhong would know abt this blog.... i'm really pissed by wat she did to me.... i mean that before we broke why cant u like try to make time to meet me?? frends are so impt to u haiix i really dono wat to do now someone pls slap me awake... i asked her for patch at the same time in the evening but haiix i really wan her back i dono wat to do?? i mean i cant forget her with so much feelings inside me... i mean she said life is still the same without u... i'm like wtf then make me sad n still the same?? at least make me happy n still the same better right... haiix i wan a patch but she wont give it to me i dono why but i know the reason is not wat i think was said to me...
well mahjong also today... lost quite alot of money really out of luck... leo say its bad sign coming.... i dono??? play so many round only won 1 round sumore they nvr play tai lei!!! win 20c only haiix lost abt 10x more than i won... really damn suay....
Labels: I Wan A Patch Very Badly
Fight on Sunday, June 08, 2008
Haiix today fucking shag day.... siewhong broke with me after 14 months... i was so surprised to see her today at shi jie hse lor... when i woke up she was there.... i dono why she even came... if her feelings are totally 0 she would not have come for me... well i came to a conclusion with her... i unwillingly let her go... i know its hard to do this for me lah cuz i really love her alot... many of my sis scold me saying drinking n smoking is living in denial... but wtf shd i do... i really had to let her go... why cant u guys just understand that i really love sh alot n i really had to sacrifice myself just to make her happy?? haiix only my bro's would understand cuz all of them very emo with me now haha.... If you really love someone u would wan her to be happy and even if it means letting her go... haiix this line was learnt from my ex gf whom i nvr talked to for a very long time...
well today was spent emo-ing with sj... he was the only bro that dont have camp.. ben leo at camp... smoked 2 packet ciggy today 20 cans of beer ytd... hang over this morning... very shag afternoon cried myself to sleep... i not pai seh to say i cry ok cuz i'm really sad... now sj at my hse watching euro.. actually we emo-ing tgt lah smoking haha
Labels: I Loved U Alot But I Want You To Be Happy
Fight on Sunday, June 08, 2008
